Lets be honest.
Any sort of control that I pretend to have of my life is one big fake. Yeah, there are definitely days that its easier and feels like no big deal to do 3 loads of laundry, fold AND put it away. But that is a rare occasion. Like super rare. Especially with Eric gone. If I'm honest, this is how laundry is done in our house.
I do a load. One. load.
It sits in the washer overnight and I usually have to smell it to make sure it doesn't reek of mildew. If I'm on my game, it only sits for a half a day.
Then it sits in the dryer for two days, until I am forced to take it out due to the fact that there are more dirty clothes to wash.
It then gets tossed on the chair in our bedroom where it can stay for 5 days.
5 DAYS PEOPLE. Its been longer too. I've done a week.
And of course some items, due to the serious wrinkles they have incurred, have to be thrown BACK into the dryer because this lady doesn't iron.
Thats just one example. Thats just the laundry. Go ahead and judge. You're probably spectacular at getting your entire households laundry done in 15 minutes flat and for that I applaud you. I'm really ok with the lack of control I have on my life in its entirety. I mean come on people, my husband and I voluntarily gave our souls to the Unites States Air Force 5 years ago. We have spent YEARS apart if you total our time up. We have missed more than 50% of our birthdays and anniversaries together. I have very
very little control over my life.
But I'm ok with it. And its because it makes me so aware over and over that I CAN'T DO A DANG THING WITHOUT JESUS!!!! Even my laundry. Yep. Totally just did that. I just spiritualized laundry. But for real, I have to. In order to get through my day without being a complete mess. Because I don't have my husband here to hug me when I'm PMSing and just need a good cry. I don't have another set of arms or able body to help get dinner on, feed Britt, and make sure Ellen isn't trying to destroy my brand new patio cushions outside. And dang it, but I don't have someone to fold laundry WITH me. So Jesus shows up in so many ways that I can easily brush Him aside when Eric is home. It makes my walk with Him so alive, so real, so tangible. Because He's not just the wonderful Heavenly Father who I have a nice time with for 45 minutes in the morning with my coffee, but He's the one thats there when no one else is. And He is even when Eric is home, I just so easily forget.
Deployments suck hardcore. But deployments remind me on a daily basis that I have a Savior who wants to enter into my life in ALL ways ALL the time. Even my laundry.
Life By Brandi capture Britt in all her cuteness AGAIN. I am looooving Britt at this age right now - she is trying to walk, is constantly searching my face as she tries to understand me as I talk and is so giggling and happy. So her 9 month photo shoot was an absolute blast.
My heart breaks when I look at her and see how much she has grown. I got genuinely POed the other day thinking about it. I have loved each new stage, I just HATE saying goodbye to her smallness and babyness. It drives me crazy!!
I adore you Britt Louise. You hold my heart in your very small, often Cheerio filled hand, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
What a gift and delight you are. I can't thank Jesus enough for giving you to me as my daughter. I am so so humbled to be your mommy.
